random tots

suddenly hav the urge to get my tots into words..
but as usual, my angmo is quite bad lah.. there will definely be alot of grammer, vocab, even spelling mistake all over.. eh..
hav u had a sudden rush of saddness before?.. u'll juz suddenly feel like crying.. i hav... sometimes i realli dunno why... or maybe i know why but i chose not to acknowlage it... confusing?.. hmm i guess this always happens to gals who like to think too much.. haiz.. i heard abt the 5 love languagues from han (he heard it from church, i didn't attend tat session.. =P).. according to myself.. i think i fall under the category of inbetween, "quality time" and "words of affirmation".. we haven been spending quality time together for sometime and i feel quite upsad abt.. we do talk on the phone for quite long.. realli long.. but i still feel sad.. argh... our schdu totally crash.. haiz..
sometimes when i do some stuffs at work, church or home.. i hav this weird feeling if ppl dun take notice of wat i did... hmm.. yeh i know they say "its not wat the ppl see tat is important is wat God see that is important".. totally agree.. but then i'm juz being truthful lah... maybe i should take some quiz to find out which one do i realli belong to... hmm.. i found this webby abt this..
http://www.fivelovelanguages.com/
of cos, learning the 5 love languages is important as well..

i haven been very truthful to everybody.. or even myself.. hmm.. some ppl who know mi from young knows abt it.. but not my new or old colleagues, bosses, new friends i know, etc..
well, i hav some talking problem... i'm not sure wat they call it... if you'v been noticing how i talk u'll know wat i mean.... i guess i'm not realli a quiet person.. i chose not to talk.. cos i'm afraid of showing my weakness.. sadly, now it has become a habit of mine to be quiet.. i hope to change this.. pray for me.
i'm trying.. tats why i swtiched to doing sales.. or u can say i'm trying to forget that i hav this problem! well, the problem still comes back now and then.. i realli dunno why.. haiz.. maybe i haven try hard eunf..
a young chap came into the shop when i was working, he has the same problem as me, kinda even more serious.. he reminded me of me.. he reminded me that i'm still trying.. i can't give up... even thou he hav the talking barrier, he still tried to ask mi quite a lot of questions abt the products.. if its for mi at his age.. i will juz walk off without asking..
this is a very complicated thingy.. some ppl say i dun hav this problem at all.. cos its all in the head.. "you can overcome this!" then, some ppl say its inborn... i realli dunno man... watever it is...
pls pls, dun give a weird eye when u see ppl trying hard to get words out of their mouth.. they are normal ppl..!! be thankful that u can talk well...